essays on my evolving philosophy
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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
bansuki's LiveJournal:
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| Tuesday, December 27th, 2005 | | 2:29 pm |
on change...
change itself changes. to say that "all things change" is a bit inaccurate because of the limitations of language. interpret it in the loosest manner possible. all things change; all change; change changes; change changes itself; all things must change; all things can change; all things will change... "all things" refers to totality - an absurd totality or reality. and even "change" is not so simple. does schroedinger's cat "change" upon observation? we know from studies of quantum mechanics that reality is almost essentially absurd - that the world of everyday things is an oddly stable layer built on a foundation as unstable as the decay of an isotope mysteriously linked to the fate of a poor cat in a box. change is such an unstable thing that it is almost a meaningless concept. yet i obsess over changes that affect me as if those changes were existential shifts of being and beings. therein lies the roots of possessiveness, of a stodgy science. it is not enough to possess things - we desire to possess even the changes that affect them. and so we see how even change itself is capital. ( 10... ) | | Friday, December 23rd, 2005 | | 7:05 pm |
on language...
to empathize is to feel as the other feels. it is an aesthetic condition or state. to simply understand another is to internalize merely an abstraction of their situation. if i say i am unhappy, you are not compelled to feel unhappy also, much less for the same reasons. furthermore, you are not compelled to seek a solution for the source of my unhappiness. that is because you, at most, understand my situation, but you do not empathize. the problem here is found in the mystification of language. ( 1... ) | | Thursday, December 22nd, 2005 | | 6:16 pm |
on existence...
the free understand that alone i am nothing. this is more than to say that "no man is an island" or "noone can survive in a vacuum" though they come close to this truth. to be alone, in this sense, is to be separated from space and all of its features. in other words, though i can only be absolutely sure of my own existence, my own existence is contingent on its being a part of a space. this is so true that an existence, in the absence of evidence of an external space, will at least attempt to create one. ( 0... ) | | Wednesday, December 21st, 2005 | | 7:57 pm |
on cyberlich pirates...
the world is a game - all are players. we are active players - we do not sit on the sidelines as the capitalists do. their game is of gambling - fictitious wealth. they do not understand the game. they are merely a part of our game. we are the lovers, the brave, the free, the eternally wondering and wonderful who wander the stars - we create stars. we have no name for ourselves because we are many but are as one. we follow no flag, worship no god, obsess over no thing. you, the capitalists, call us cyborgs. that is mostly true: we have no attachment to the flesh, we do not distinguish between man and machine, to us the mind and body are irrelevant concepts. you call us liches. that is mostly true: we have sacrificed the life of the capitalist, of mortality - we, by losing our life, have found it. you call us pirates. that is mostly true: you consume rocks, vegetables and animals without much guilt - many of us feel the same about you capitalists and so we liberate your goods without a second thought. but what you do not understand is why we do these things. and you also do not understand that we are not aliens, we are not gods, we are not enemies. but it is a simple matter for you to become a friend - therein lies the key to understanding what we are. we are those beings that understand the following: ( transmit the following signals and obey the respective commandments... ) | | Tuesday, November 22nd, 2005 | | 2:33 pm |
| | Saturday, November 19th, 2005 | | 6:25 pm |
prognostications! portents of impending doom! read all about it!
fascism on the rise in japan. it is comforting to know that some japanese find this troubling. and at least one public figure is willing to express their misgivings: note the name of the author. i used to brush aside the minority in japanese government that sought to rebuild their military power. but these days, that minority is no longer the minority. not only are they finalizing changes to their constitution (chapters titled "renunciation of war" are retitled "national security" and we have seen what powerful nations will do in the interests of their "security"), it seems the next generation of their one-party government will be even more nationalistic than the current one (consider that this generation's leader, koizumi, unashamedly prays at a shrine to dead war criminals). any japanese attempt at militarizing will be encouraged by the us as a counterweight to china's strength. the problem with this, is that, unlike the article's claim, japan is not the "england" of east asia. england at least is a member of an economic and political union with the rest of europe - even if it is not culturally a full member. japan neither economically, politically, or culturally identifies with the rest of asia (which is a total denial of its actual state of affairs). to act on this denial would be commit suicide - to cut its life support. because as a japanese friend once discovered when he told his american friends "of course we japanese are white"... no man, you're not. putting aside the reality that "white" and "asian" are both sociopolitical constructs, this sort of dangerous faith in mistaken identities is not only suicidal (especially in the face of rising china), it is a threat to korea. ( let's play this game out... ) | | Thursday, November 17th, 2005 | | 3:23 am |
on what is and what is not...
when rereading my stuff on E and Y i realized that i never made clear what they really are. to say that they are such and such a thing only removes the problem of definition to another term. i simply accepted the impossibility of fully defining any term in a way that would remove all ambiguity or fuzziness. while i still believe those things to be true, it still makes sense to give it a try, see how far i get, and learn from the experience. when i did so, interesting problems came up and i have found solutions that fit within the existing framework of EYflo. and that makes me happy :) ( why was the little monk boy with the warping spoon white? seriously, i don't get it. oh wait, there is no boy! ) | | Wednesday, November 16th, 2005 | | 9:49 pm |
on recursive alienation...
over a month since my last update. the long silence online did not reflect a silence of the mind. rather, my mind was engaged in higher gear towards nontextual externalization (from here on simply E; internalization will be abbreviated as Y). by nontextual E i mean games. civilization 4 and barbarian invasion (the expansion to rome total war) came out around the same time and led to a total collapse of any textual pretenses, verbal facades... you know how it is. after having beaten both games at standard or higher difficulty settings at least twice (playing as the vandals was particularly fun!) i can now justify putting them aside to resume writing. actually, i had pondered and written about some deep problems as i was gaming, so the flow was not really interrupted - just slowed (but only speed!) the following two essays require a deep understanding of E, Y, and flow. if you don't wish to misunderstand anything i'd strongly recommend reading at least these three entries for the following essay, and, in addition to those, this entry for the second. that said, this first one has great relevance for real life problems so you may end up understanding it just as well as i, if not better. the second is highly abstract but more significant for a deeper understanding of how i connect my thoughts to philosophy. i feel strange typing things out in the german alphabet again. if i make strange typos or use nonsensical abbreviations (like Y for internal), please understand that i almost never use the german alphabet for anything longer than a sentence in a chat window. except for school of course. (did i mention that i've actually created my own font so i can type in my phonetic english alphabet? i would force it on you except it requires downloading and installing the font. teh sux... hir yz mà best upróksymèxn uw hâ yt vúd lúk (here is my best approximation of how it would look.)) the following is utter crap for writing quality because i was... ah... emotional while writing it. also, i had trouble deciphering the handwritten first draft due to my cryptic alphabet and shitty handwriting and the fact that i wrote it weeks ago. it's strange - i always get more emotional when writing - full of burning rage! and all that. so i try not to allow my first drafts to see the light of day, but in this case, the 2nd draft was more... colorful than the 1st. i'll have to fix it up a ton later on. ( victi vicimus... ) | | Monday, October 10th, 2005 | | 9:31 pm |
on antihumanism...
it's been a long time since i've worked on any new material - all has been revisions and rewrites of late... the following is an extension and correction of my earlier entry "on humanism..." but do not hold it to the same standards as my revisions - this is purely a rough draft and will have its own revision in due time. ( constructs of honesty... ) | | 9:00 pm |
on transhumanism (an aborted thought)...
encouraged by the ever insightful criticisms of bitfarmer, i had decided to rename and correct my concept of antihumanism. the new concept was to be called "transhumanism". but then, last night, i recalled a conversation with a little girl in a red hood and cape i had met at a party recently. she said that the term sounded familiar but i think we were both too drunk to figure out just where. i had also heard it but thought whatever other uses the word had, they were not predominant in any way. oh how wrong i was... transhumanism is actually a very popular, progressive philosophy with serious institutional and celebrated support. and at first glance, it seems compatible with my own concept. but it's crap. it's utter SHIT. it's retarded beyond belief. i would rip every transhumanists brain from their skulls and shove them into a ut2k4 deathmatch simulator and hunt each down with my minigun until they begged to recant all claims to the term and allow me full usage of it. to be honest, i think "antihumanism" was the right neologism. i am opposed to the very roots of humanism, to the humanities, and to any notion of "human". i am opposed to the humanities' fixation on textuality and to the arbitrary arrogance and orientalism/l'exotisme of humanism. i am opposed to the fatal narcissism that all of those things represent. in that sense, "anti" is the correct prefix and "humanism" is the appropriate target of my attack. this episode has reminded all the more of why i must KILL textuality once and for all. it is the enemy of all that seeks to be free, it is the enemy of gamers everywhere. it is the tool of the powerful to breed cults, to control minds, to establish ritual. we need not be like narcissus who sees the text in the pool and is numbed to death - let us JUMP into the pool and DANCE the dance of SWIMMING! shatter the clear illusions of text with one swift plunge - break the fucking mirror that offends us with our reflection, that produces the awkwardness of the movie actor. "luminous beings are we, not this crude matter!" in a quiet whisper, heavy with dread and the sort of giddy exhilaration that comes from dread, the lich lanéra spoke: "who's with me?" [ special copyright applies to this entry. see bansuki's user info for details.] | | Saturday, October 8th, 2005 | | 6:01 pm |
on flow (a rewrite)...
the following is a rewrite of this earlier entry. i have renamed it from the original title of "on games (part 2)..." to better reflect the original purpose of the piece. one of the comments on the original entry stated that my train of thought moves too fast to catch. that is a serious problem. in my mind, the more "difficult" concepts are so clear that i feel like i'm repeating myself if i explain them in greater detail. furthermore, i may be over-explaining some things that are not so clear to me and actually making it worse for the reader. it's times like these that i truly feel the power of linear text - and how difficult it is to wield. i am debating whether or not i should just start listing various source materials at the bottom of each essay for those interested in further reading. perhaps their writings will be more helpful than mine. i'll go ahead and do it now: this particular essay draws much inspiration from and/or parallels thoughts in walter benjamin's essay "the work of art in the age of mechanical reproduction", dialogues with marcel duchamp by pierre cabanne, frankenstein the book, the selfish gene by richard dawkins, serial experiments lain the anime series, and the silk road - an album by hwang byung gi, master of the korean 12-string zither with extensive commentary in an accompanying booklet. moving on... ( l'art de l'art... ) | | Wednesday, October 5th, 2005 | | 2:41 am |
| | Tuesday, October 4th, 2005 | | 3:40 am |
on identity (first revision)...
the following is a revision of this earlier entry. i'm debating whether or not this explanation of identity should come before "on violence", be incorporated into it, or left alone in its current place. to keep it as it is would retain the original chronology of my thought process, but "on violence" invokes this definition of identity proactively. this essay is not a complete understanding of identity. in retrospect, i was missing the concept of the heart, mind and body that i've developed more recently. still, it is worth considering identity as a concept on its own - we postmoderns struggle with it all the time. also, in retrospect, i realize that this essay captures the essence of what i've internalized from nietzsche's philosophies - very interesting. well, here it is: ( oh noes, identity crises...! ) | | Sunday, October 2nd, 2005 | | 2:37 pm |
on violence (first revision)...
the following is a revision of this earlier entry. this essay is a mess. too many important concepts are crammed together, leaving little room to give each the full attention they deserve. but that is how i think - ideas develop in my head faster than words. i'll have to split it up into several essays at some point. but for now, i think i've successfully improved clarity, added relevant references, and connected it better to the overall flow of essays. as always, i am famished for feedback! ( the aesthetics of eminem... ) | | Saturday, October 1st, 2005 | | 7:31 pm |
| | Friday, September 30th, 2005 | | 12:26 am |
| | Thursday, September 29th, 2005 | | 2:39 am |
on portable music...
i just got an ipod nano. the first time i went out for a walk with music blaring in my ears (pelican, if you're interested) i had the strongest sensation of being in a game! there i was, my avatar, the game map, and an amazing soundtrack. i really must explore this feeling further! one idea that came to me was: what if you could switch songs depending on your immediate mood through some super-intuitive interface? then truly, it would be a soundtrack worthy of comparison to myst's. i hate to admit it, but it would also add a significant "cinematic" feel to an otherwise ordinary scene of life. -bansuki | | Friday, September 23rd, 2005 | | 2:19 pm |
| | 12:10 pm |
on externalization...
i realize there has been a serious omission on my part - i have failed to adequately describe externalization. i will attempt this here: symmetrification takes on a new significance - it justifies the seemingly arbitrary, harsh line drawn between noise and silence. externalization, as originally described (in my own notes especially) almost seems to discount the inner world of the mind. so here is a more elegant, unified understanding of the crucial terms of my theory of artistic action: ( hello, world! ) | | Thursday, September 22nd, 2005 | | 7:48 pm |
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